Rant Time!

Okay, I don't really want very often, but this time it's necessary.
First of all, I'm not close to my dad. He and my mom split up when I was just a baby, and I would generally only see him for Christmas while I was growing up. I'm not close to much of his side of the family, especially since his mom died a few years ago. Many of the aunts, uncles, and cousins, I haven't seen in 10 years. 
However, I read on facebook yesterday, that one of these uncles died on Monday, after a long battle with cancer. I never knew he had cancer. 
Maybe I am overreacting, but I don't think I should have found out about this death on facebook. Would it have been too much to ask for my father to pick up a phone and call me? Or even before a simple, "hey your uncle has cancer" would have been nice. Nope. Nothing. 
I guess it shouldn't surprise me. My dad never seemed to want to be a part of my life until I had children of my own. Once I turned 21 and could start seeing local bands play in bars, I finally started seeing him more often, but I feel like it's too late. He didn't want to be a part of my life, so why should I attempt to be a part of his? We didn't even go over for Christmas this year because he went out of town instead. He didn't attend any of my children's activities. He is more concerned with his step-children's lives than his own children's. 
I don't know why this is bothering me as much as it is. I guess part of it was there was a private funeral for my grandfather last year, and I wasn't even invited to be a part of that. Maybe I should just give up. All it would take is a few simple facebook deletes, and he is out of my life. It's not like he would even notice.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Music = Life!

Ok anyone who knows me personally knows how important music is to me. About six years ago, I guess you could say I had a crisis of faith. My faith was music. I had lost a really close friend of mine to suicide, and since he was the drummer of my favorite local band, I had no desire to listen to music anymore. In the car, my stereo was off. If my boyfriend at the time was playing music at home, I would put on noise canceling headphones just to drown out the sound. I didn't want to hear anything that would remind me of my friend. Of course, being a drummer in a popular rock band, his friends and family put together a benefit. Several amazing local bands played that day. I couldn't not go. During the first three bands, I sat outside. I couldn't bring myself to jump back into the world of live music. The bassist of one of the bands stepped outside for a cigarette between sets. We started talking. Stu will never know how much he helped me that day. We talked about absolu
Read more

The Fate of Saving Avalon

When I first ventured into the world of fantasy with the Saving Avalon series, I admit I was skeptical at first. Although fantasy is usually my chosen genre when I am reading, I had never written something like it before. Everything was new to me. Finding Her Wings didn't sell as well as I had hoped. Yes, part of it is my fault because I am so horrible at marketing. Then as I sat down to start on book two, I decided that the antagonist in Finding Her Wings is not such a bad guy after all. Most of book two was spent redeeming the past actions of this character. Of course, a demons actions cannot be redeemed in only one book. He will constantly be trying to prove that he has changed. Now I am struggling with book three. I thought I had a title and general plot figured out, but now I am not so sure. I'm missing writing about my social issues. I miss the characters in my Self Inflicted Saga. I think I need to revisit them for awhile. I need a break from Saving Avalon.
Read more
From the Corner of Her Eye is available for presale in the Kindle and Nook store! Release date is tomorrow! When I first started seriously writing in January, I never would have believed that I would already have THREE books available in just five short months. I already have a start on a brand new one! In addition to writing, most of my time is spent with my children. There are five of them, and every single one can be a handful, but put them all together and I go insane! My two year old is well into her Terrible Twos, and now has the nickname the Madi Monster. It's definitely fitting. Yesterday, I was scribbling down some ideas for Self Inflicted, and she decided to stuff a rubber duckie down the toilet. Later in the evening, I had given her a bath. While I was cleaning up the bathroom floor from her splashing mess, she decided to head out the back door of our house...butt naked.  I love her to death, but is it too much to ask to get her to take a nap so I can get some work
Read more